Well, last week was another long, frustrating one full of job hunting dead ends, inappropriate interview questions, and outright scams for me. There have been some better leads this week that I've got my fingers crossed for, but for now, let’s forget all that and celebrate this week’s Catching Fire premier with another fictional job I’m glad I can’t have!
(Click the links to read Least Envied Fictional Job #4, #5, and check out Matt’s list on the same topic on his blog)
Do you like handling all the little details?
Do you like to make others look good?
Could you make a rabid badger pageant run smoothly if you were in charge?
Does teen angst roll right off your back?
Can you wear a smile to work EVERY day?
Consider this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity as a Tribute Escort for the beloved annual Hunger Games! You will be in charge of seeing one district’s lucky contenders smoothly through the pre-game festivities and Victory Tour (if applicable). Minimum 8 years experience in event planning required, preferably in a school, pageant circuit, or other teen-oriented field. Presentable appearance and positive attitude a MUST!
Compensation: Competitive
Travel: 90%
Type of work: FT seasonal/temp
First, the obvious. This job is horrible. Everything about the Hunger Games (the fictional fights to the death among twenty-four teens and preteens, not the book and movie series of the same name in which they exist) is horrible.
(Click the links to read Least Envied Fictional Job #4, #5, and check out Matt’s list on the same topic on his blog)
Do you like handling all the little details?
Do you like to make others look good?
Could you make a rabid badger pageant run smoothly if you were in charge?
Does teen angst roll right off your back?
Can you wear a smile to work EVERY day?
Consider this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity as a Tribute Escort for the beloved annual Hunger Games! You will be in charge of seeing one district’s lucky contenders smoothly through the pre-game festivities and Victory Tour (if applicable). Minimum 8 years experience in event planning required, preferably in a school, pageant circuit, or other teen-oriented field. Presentable appearance and positive attitude a MUST!
Compensation: Competitive
Travel: 90%
Type of work: FT seasonal/temp
First, the obvious. This job is horrible. Everything about the Hunger Games (the fictional fights to the death among twenty-four teens and preteens, not the book and movie series of the same name in which they exist) is horrible.
It really shouldn't be necessary to illustrate why.
Being a Tribute Escort is a lot closer than most Capitol residents get to how horrible it is, because it involves unmediated contact with the tributes.
Effie Trinket may not have noticed, but when Katniss begins to warm to Haymitch, her observations about how hard his job is apply nearly as well to hers. The job is to spend time each year helping two kids through the game prep only to (almost certainly) watch them die. There’s not a sane person this wouldn’t wear on.
But let’s suppose we’re not sane people, and we’re able to accept the Hunger Games blithely and obliviously as business as usual.
Effie Trinket may not have noticed, but when Katniss begins to warm to Haymitch, her observations about how hard his job is apply nearly as well to hers. The job is to spend time each year helping two kids through the game prep only to (almost certainly) watch them die. There’s not a sane person this wouldn’t wear on.
But let’s suppose we’re not sane people, and we’re able to accept the Hunger Games blithely and obliviously as business as usual.
Like so.
That leaves us with a highly competitive (only twelve at a time in the world!) entertainment job, with all the politics, backbiting, crazy hours, and stress that entails. People claw at each other to get this job, and to get placed with the best districts once they have it. We’re specifically told this. And for what? A few minutes of screen time at the Reaping before the real stars – the tributes – take the stage.
It’s not as if this can be a direct stepping stone to a more prominent career. Capitol adults can't aspire to be tributes, and there’s only one Caesar Flickerman, who doesn’t seem to be going anywhere anytime soon. This is all you get, a little reflected fame off your escort-ees, and when the cameras are off and no one else is paying attention, you’re stuck with two angry and/or depressed teenagers,
It’s not as if this can be a direct stepping stone to a more prominent career. Capitol adults can't aspire to be tributes, and there’s only one Caesar Flickerman, who doesn’t seem to be going anywhere anytime soon. This is all you get, a little reflected fame off your escort-ees, and when the cameras are off and no one else is paying attention, you’re stuck with two angry and/or depressed teenagers,
Or, in the case of the career districts, bred and raised homicidal maniacs.
An insane lack of empathy for what’s made them angry/depressed/maniacal may keep this job from crushing what passes for your soul, but it won’t make angry/depressed/maniacal teenagers into pleasant company.
Agree? Disagree? Comments are always welcome! Or keep up with my fictional musings by joining me on Facebook, on Twitter, or by signing up for email updates in the panel on the right!
Agree? Disagree? Comments are always welcome! Or keep up with my fictional musings by joining me on Facebook, on Twitter, or by signing up for email updates in the panel on the right!
