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Why Your Synopsis Probably Doesn't Suck as Much as You Think It Does

1/11/2014

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Well, it’s synopsis time again for me in the great cycle of writing.

…Yay.

I’m lucky enough now to have the incredible comfort of an agent, publisher, and contract already in my corner, so in recent times, synopses have become more of a nuisance than a source of terror for me, but I remember well staring at that single digital page, mortified by the idea that this ridiculous Dick and Jane parody of my work could be one of the only glimpses a prospective agent or publisher would get of it, and I know most other authors have felt exactly the same way.

Since my synopsis of Confessions of the Very First Zombie Slayer (That I Know of) was evidently adequate, I’ve already been asked a couple times for tips on writing a good one. Someday I fully intend to post the original Zombie Slayer synopsis I used for fellow authors to analyze to their hearts’ content, but since that would require a major spoiler alert, it would be silly to do before anyone’s even had the chance to read the book.

Besides, any advice I ever give on synopsis writing will be couched in the simplest, truest answer I have to that question about how to write a good one: You can’t.

So today, I’m just going to take that truth about synopses and have some fun. I’m taking five fantastic and successful books and making my earnest best guess, as an author who’s written a successful synopsis in the past, at what the best possible opening setup paragraphs of their synopses might have looked like.

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Survivors of the zombie war from around the world share their experiences with an interviewer, starting with the doctor who treated the first bites sustained in rural China.

What, no characters worth mentioning by name yet? If Brooks hadn’t already proven himself as a successful author of a zombie book in an unheard of format, this would have taken one hell of a leap of faith.

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TALLY YOUNGBLOOD is about to turn sixteen, the age when people are surgically changed from Uglies to Pretties. When her friend, SHAY, runs away before her procedure, Tally’s is also withheld, and she is forced to infiltrate the unaltered rebel Smokies who live outside the sanctioned towns to bring her back.

I see you’ve been studying your Twilight Zone, Mr. Westerfeld. Good for you. Going to be able to fit any story in between your social commentary there?

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R is a zombie, existing in meaningless deadness and the occasional taste of life that comes from eating brains. When he eats the brain of PERRY KELVIN, he absorbs his love for his girlfriend, JULIE GRIGIO, and takes her back to his airport hive.

Can already see where this is going. A zombie is cured by love? And you’re selling this as a serious, adult, award-bait piece? Really?

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Sixteen-year-old KATNISS EVERDEEN has spent the five years since her father’s death taking care of her sister, PRIMROSE. When Prim is selected to compete in The Hunger Games, an annual, televised fight to the death among twenty-four twelve-through-eighteen-year-olds-

Wait. Stop right there. I already suffered through Battle Royale. And this version’s YA? Doesn’t that mean it’ll be even more suffocatingly formulaic than the original?

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Raised by an aunt and uncle who forbid even the idea of magic, HARRY POTTER doesn’t know he’s a wizard until a friendly giant, HAGRID, comes to take him to wizarding school. Hagrid tells him about the magical world he comes from and, reluctantly, about the dark wizard VOLDEMORT who disappeared after trying to kill Harry ten years ago, making him famous among wizards as “the boy who lived.”

Ugh. Most generic Low Fantasy premise ever, even in a world before all the knockoffs that followed it. Total wish-fulfillment, and we’ve all already read The Chronicles of Narnia.

My point is, the barest basics of any book, especially a genre book, no matter how awesome, will sound at least a little ridiculous, and anyone who routinely reads synopses will know that.

A synopsis isn’t a work of art; it’s a business tool. It just needs to do its job of proving that you can construct a sentence and format a document and that your book has a plot, and letting industry professionals know what that plot is at a glance if they so desire. So long as you've done your best to that effect, all I can say is don’t beat yourself up because it’s not “good” in the artistic way your book is.

It can’t be.


Agree? Disagree? Comments are always welcome! Or keep up with my fictional musings by joining me on Facebook, on Twitter, or by signing up for email updates in the panel on the right!
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Fi's Five Favorite Fictional Beginnings #4: The Hunger Games

1/7/2014

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(You can read Favorite Fictional Beginning #5 here)

I’ve written about The Hunger Games before, on my lists of Favorite Fictional Couples and Least Envied Fictional Jobs, and it’s one of those stories that will no doubt continue to pop up on my favorites lists again and again, because it does so many things well. That’s what makes it a favorite, after all.

This spot it earns has a bit of a story to it.

I got on the Hunger Games wagon in late 2011. All three books were already out and wildly successful, and Matt was going to buy me the first book for Christmas. I asked him to get it for me early, so I’d have more time to get through it before the movie came out, because that’s my rule; a movie coming out based on something I’m remotely interested in getting into is the final warning that I’m way behind and need to get with the program.

This was right after the Twilight mania, and I was in a very cynical mental place, assuming that any YA so widely and fervently embraced must be more of the same unrelentingly neutered and shallow sentiment, with a few surprising high points and/or laughable low points to enjoy at best. What I found instead when I opened the book was the ultimate antidote.

This wasn’t some twelve-year-old’s wish-fulfillment fanfic with the names changed. This was the start of a personal yet full-scale epic, almost a horror epic in nature, with a more believably tough, complex, and developed protagonist as of the third page than many epics can pull off in their entirety. And she was a girl!
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My daughters will know her. And my sons too.
I couldn’t stop reading on the way home from the bookstore, no matter how sick I got. And I couldn’t stop reading bits of it out loud to Matt. We ended up buying and finishing the entire trilogy together before Christmas, taking turns reading it to each other.

It’s true that the first act of The Hunger Games is oddly paced, with a lot of time spent on prep before the games begin, and it’s also true that I asked myself a few times along the way, “Shouldn’t I be bored by now?” But, obviously, I never was. The introduction to the world and its inherent satire is that compelling, and Katniss’s presence always adds to it, without becoming either passive observation or heavy-handed commentary.

Katniss is not passive. Nor is she philosophical. She’s an angry, hardened, distrustful loner, with a direct, straightforward approach to life and a vast, carefully hidden capacity for love, and everything she does and thinks comes naturally from who she is. The biggest reason The Hunger Games had to take this spot is that I can identify the exact moment when Katniss and her world had both Matt and me hooked.
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"Entrails, no hissing. This is the closest we will ever come to love."
Yeah, there was no turning back after that.

Agree? Disagree? Comments are always welcome! Or keep up with my fictional musings by joining me on
Facebook, on Twitter, or by signing up for email updates in the panel on the right!
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